House Husband?

My husband and I discussed it and we decided it was the right time for him to go back to school full time. That meant I was the sole income for the house. This semester he only has morning classes with mimimum homework. I thought he would take over some of the house chores but instead he comes home and nearly dives mid air onto the sofa and watches ESPN all day. I come home and it looks like a college frat house. We dont have kids at home. Is it fair of me to ask him to assume more of the house chores since I am the income provider .. How do I explain that it feels disrepectful that he sleeps on the couch in the afternoon and watches TV while I come home and do laundry and pick up the mess. I know he is a good man and I think he is just experiencing a little bit of freedom but I need to get this under control before my feelings get really hurt. Any suggestions?|||It is more than fair for you to ask him to do more. As a man, I can tell you he is living the dream life... who wouldn't want to watch ESPN and sleep all day? Unfortunately, this is not the way adults behave. I think it is wonderful that he is getting the opportunity to go back to school full-time, you are doing a great job support his dream. But he needs to support you as well and that means helping around the house and being a responsible man. How long do you really believe you can hold your tongue before more resentment creeps in and it ends up hurting the relationship? There really isn't a choice here, relationships are based on communication and you should communicate to him that you are disappointed with what you are seeing. If he is a good man like you say, then he will take your words seriously and look to help out around the house. He has had his chance to play teenager again, now that is over and it is time to take the duty of being a husband and partner seriously. You must address it or it will just create more problems in the end.|||do like any other wife would do tell him to get up off of his butt and help out!|||You would be completely justified in asking him to pick stuff up and help out with the chores. Or, tell him to get a part-time job in the evenings. Don't let him be lazy. It isn't fair that you are the only person contributing anything to your household.|||Fix him a nice dinner and then talk to him about it. Maybe he is just waiting for you to say something. Talking never hurt anyone.|||Yes I know you need to handle this now before it gets out of control. I waited too long %26amp; I do everything in my house Plus take care of 3 kids. What you should do is tell him how you feel %26amp; ask him please help you cause it is hard on you to work %26amp; do all the household chores.You don't have to bring up that you are the only one working cause that will be more trouble than it's worth. Just ask can you please give me some help. If he is the good man you say he will be more than happy to help out his "baby".|||tell him you work and when he worked you took care of the house work so now its his turn to help around the house. Tell him to help around the house you can not go to work and come home and except to do everything it is His time to help around the house. You done it and now obvisouly like i said b4 it his turn.|||When I went back to school for a year, I was too damned busy studying to watch TV. I also did much of the laundry and vacuuming and had dinner ready on the table when my wife got home. Tell the lazy B*stard to get off his as5 and help....actually, Don't scream and yell (at least the first time), just let him know what your expectations are and that the dynamics of your relationship have changed. You could also try "No housework - No sex".... Good Luck





BTW I got straight "A's", carried on an independent research project, and finished as the college's Biological Science Dept. student of the year out of 1200 biology and anatomy students...I also received full scholarship offers for Nursing School. Oh yeah, I did this in my 50's|||You shouldn't have to ask. He should just do it, but since he isn't, yes, it is fair to ask him to do more.|||Tell the lazy git to do some work.


If he don't then hide the tv remote.


Just explain to him what you have just written in this question.|||Well, it is Football sesaon, but seriously, you should just explain to him how this action makes you feel. More than likely he'll understand and pick-up a bit. At least he should understand if he cares.|||Men Men Men...........they are always there to mess up a perfect life for us, aren't they?!!!!


Y'know, you can divide the house responsibilities, or ask him to take up a part time job in the afternoon, so there wont be any resentment when work is not done. When he gets the job, you can afford a part time help also and with no issues on house chores, you can have a better relationship with your husband and spend more time together.|||Simple, call the cable for disconnect and no sex for a week. Don't give him any cash. You need to make a list for him to do like fix and/or clean the house. It is very important for you and your husband to have good communication. Hope it helps.





Good luck.|||Talk to him about it


communication is key|||You tell him straight up....get to work OR get to work! He is taking advantage of you and he already knows it. If you go for this bull, it will only get worse. His "freedom" is enslaving you. That is quite a price to pay, don't you think? IF he has time like this, he is failing on a much larger level....he should be taking much heavier loads at school to shorten his school time...what is going on here? Second childhood?|||A good women will lay down the law when needed. If yo man is slacking chances are he knows he is and thinks you won't say anything. Be a strong black woman ( I know your not black) and let him have it. He'll understand that you've worked all day and don't want to come home and clean up after his 2minute in the bedroom, espn watching, morning class only, got a wife to clean when she gets home a33.|||Tell him straight up how it needs to be and when he's done with the chores then he can enjoy his free time. Responsibility comes first. The nerve for him to think he has nothing better to do than sit around and watch TV!|||Talk to him...tell him how you feel. My husband is a house husband...he takes cares of your daugther while I work. He only works on the weekends. Which I don't have a problem with that. At first he was the same way as your husband...till I sat him down and talk to him. Now he washes the dishes, cleans the living room and our little girl's room...and for me...I cook and clean what needs to be clean once or twice a week. It works!|||I think if you explained to to him what you just explained to him, it would go a long way. Communication is key here. If he doesn't know the way you feel, he can't change his behavior. And yes, I do think you are right in expecting he assume some of the household duties now you are the sole provider here. In the end, you don't want a pile of resentment that will later blow up in both of your faces. Good luck, and happy talking!|||first I would find out what hes thinking. sometimes men think there is a fairy that comes in and the house just magically gets cleaned. depending on what hes thinking I would hope he would be open for discussion as to whats needed from him. talk with him you will be amazed as to the thinking of the male species.|||If he quit his job and only has morning classes, tell him to get a part time job, or else.


When I went back to college, I worked full time to support my family, and went to college four evenings a week, and all day Saturday, carrying a 3/4 load. Yes I did get my BA degree, and made the Dean's honor roll list.


I then obtained employment in my field with an excellent salary.


Sounds like you have a lazy husband who is taking advantage of you.|||YEAH YOU SHOULD TALK TO HIM


PLAN A ROMANTIC DINNER


AND TALK TO HIM CALMLY


WITHOUT MAKING HIM FEEL LIKE YOU ARE ORDERING HIM TO DO SOMETHING


EXPLAIN TO HIM HOW YOU FEEL AND THINK





HE JUST MIGHT SURPRISE YOU ONE DAY.





GOOD LUCK